For the first time in years, I did something completely on my own.
Yesterday, I wrote about pushing myself outside of my comfort zone.
About learning how to do things alone.
About trying to rebuild parts of myself that I lost somewhere along the way.
And recently, I pushed myself further than I have in a very long time.
My kids are adults now, which is still strange for me to say out loud.
I don’t get to see them as often as I want to anymore.
Between working full time and going to school for my Master’s degree, life stays busy.
The days blur together sometimes.
But my oldest — my ride or die — has been begging me to come visit.
So I did.
I booked a flight for the weekend.
Didn’t even use PTO.
Just packed a bag and went.
That probably sounds small to some people.
But for me?
It was huge.
I haven’t taken a trip by myself in years unless it was work-related.
Actually, the last time I traveled alone was when I was 19 years old and flew out to surprise a friend for their high school graduation.
Nineteen.
And before this trip, my anxiety was through the roof.
I had panic attacks before leaving.
Second-guessed myself constantly.
Thought about canceling more than once.
Because somewhere along the way, I stopped trusting myself to move through the world alone.
But deep down, I knew this trip wasn’t really about getting on a plane.
It was about proving to myself that I still could.
That I am still capable of doing hard things.
Of choosing myself.
Of stepping into discomfort instead of hiding from it.
And honestly?
I had an amazing time.
I got to see my kid.
Meet his friends.
See the life he’s building for himself.
And maybe most importantly…
I got to see that he’s really okay.
There’s something beautiful about watching your children become their own people.
Not needing you the same way anymore, but still wanting you there.
That part meant everything to me.
And somewhere between the anxiety, the airport, the panic, the laughter, and the quiet moments…
I realized something.
Healing isn’t always loud.
Sometimes healing looks like booking the ticket anyway.
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